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Smart Mama Advice on Cribs

This morning’s Today Show report on cribs and baby safety reminded us that despite the American Academy of Pediatrics caution to “not use pillows, bumper pads, quilts, comforters, sheepskins, stuffed toys, other soft products, or any objects that could increase the risk of suffocation or strangulation”, major stores continue to market and sell these items without warning parents-to-be of the dangers.

Shame on them.

The new book Smart Mama, Smart Money, offers this simple advice:

“When it comes to most tiny-tot gear, we’re in favor of hand-me-down and flea market finds, but there are certain items you should not buy secondhand. Topping the list are car seats, cribs, and baby bedding.

You must buy a new crib. In June 2011 the Consumer Product Safety Commission issued stringent new safety standards. These new regulations require sturdier construction, stronger hardware, and more rigorous product testing for all cribs. Drop-sided cribs may no longer be sold. When you go out shopping make certain that you choose a crib with the following labels: 16 CFR 1219 (full-size cribs) and 16 CFR 1220 (non-full-size cribs).

Buy the least expensive well-put-together crib out there (think IKEA), but splurge on an organic mattress. Yes, you need to buy a new mattress, one that snugly fits inside the crib. Baby will spend more time in the crib than anywhere else, and the less he is exposed to off-gassing and fumes from mattress components like formaldehyde, phthalates, polyurethane foam, PBDEs and other chemicals, the better.

As for bedding, buy 100 percent cotton sheets with a high thread count, full elastic bottom, and no nylon in any of the stitching. These will be washed and rewashed, so you want them to hold up over time, with no dangerous shrinkage or unraveling in any place. Buy Buy Baby (Bed Bath & Beyond for minis) and the Land of Nod (Crate & Barrel for minis) have cute sheets at all price points. Think of it this way: Since baby bumpers and quilts are now verboten as smothering hazards, sheets may be the place to liven up baby’s room with a spot of sweet or zesty color.”

 


 

Mother’s Day is right around the corner and we’re back with five of our favorite budget ideas for every mom on your list!

1. Herbs


Whether the mom you’re recognizing for all she does lives in an apartment or on in the country, nothing spices up a meal more than fresh herbs.  Arrive with shovel in hand ready to plant  them for her in the garden or in a window box.  (Make sure your assortment includes lemon verbena so she can brew the best herbal tea ever.)

 

2. Melitta Coffee Cone and Filter

The single best cup of the day is the first cup. The simplest and best coffee is made using this $2.99  Melitta cone. Period. (So reasonably priced you’ll have enough left to spring for designer coffee beans and a gorgeous new mug!)


3.  Hip New Nail Polish and Manicure

Give her a manicure because on Mother’s Day she shouldn’t be lifting a single well polished digit. We’re in love with the rad-hot-new NARS colors for spring. 


4. A Massage (Mom is Worth the Splurge)

As every mother knows, there is not a day that goes by without worry about her little (or big) darlings. Today’s your day to take the stress off her shoulders– (you are responsible for it, after all). Spring for a gift certificate for a long relaxing massage.


5. A Book

If the mom (sister, aunt, friend, cousin …whoever you’re Mother’s Day gifting) is a romantic, a cook, a bird watcher, a travel fanatic, a quilter, hiker, sewer, basket weaver? Whatever her passion or interest there is a book that will thrill her. Better yet, give her our latest: Smart Mama Smart Money, the anti-Tiger-anti-French-Mom’s-have-it-all-figured out sane approach to parenting that will relieve her guilt and let her sleep better at night:)

What do you want for Mother’s Day?


Teaching Pleasure, Individual Responsibility and the Value of a Good Old Fashioned Ice Cream Cone

Whether it’s looking both ways when crossing the street or not touching their privates in public or making safe choices when it comes to drinking and drugs, it’s a parent’s job to instill in their kids the values and habits needed to make wise choices. The same is true when it comes to food and healthy eating.

When the ice cream truck ruckus in Brooklyn hit the news this week, with some parents wanting to evict ice cream vendors from a local park, it was hard not to feel a surge of compassion for those moms anxious to both protect their kids from empty sugar calories, and themselves from their toddler’s ice-cream-craving tantrums.

After all, what mom hasn’t been overwhelmed by the awesome responsibility of parenthood? What mom doesn’t want to protect their kid from the world around them? But, it’s impossible to screen out the real world, whether it’s ice cream vendors in the park or fries at McDonald’s. Soon enough they aren’t toddlers and it’s impossible to police what they eat  (or do) when they aren’t at home.

Like all other aspects of parenting, it’s your job to model behavior and hope that when they are on their own the habits of a healthy childhood are imprinted in their daily routines. The best a smart parent can do is consistently offer them great, fresh food so when they’re on their own making choices, they’ll know the difference between the good stuff and the junk.  It’s also your job to show them how to have fun, how to enjoy an occasional treat and to learn how to self-regulate and trust their own bodies and choices.

In the just released, Smart Mama, Smart Money: Raising Happy Healthy Kids Without Breaking the Bank, I relate this experience from my childhood: My mom was a terrific old-fashioned cook. Her mother grew up on a dairy farm, and her dad owned a restaurant; she made simple food from fresh ingredients. With five kids and a limited budget, she rarely served the TV dinners we tortured her to buy. On occasion she caved and we would set up the folding TV tables in front of Star Trek to enjoy our treat. When we ate those TV dinners it was like we’d left our country or were lost in space eating foreign foods.  They tasted nothing like the roast chicken she made, or the applesauce that went through the old Foley mill, or the green beans that came from the garden, or the hand mashed potatoes.  But man, we loved those dinners in the aluminum tray. But it wasn’t real food. It was like the occasional candy bar, or made-for-astronauts dehydrated ice cream, or cotton candy at the amusement park.

As our kids grew up, just like my mom, I served them fresh food made from fresh ingredients. But on occasion we also stopped at the evil empire and bought them the Happy Meals they craved (and just like my mom crinkled her nose up when asked why she wasn’t joining us in eating grizzled chicken and cardboard potatoes, I crinkled my nose up at the burgers and pies); we lined up at Dairy Queen for vanilla cones dipped in chocolate; we even kept a junk food drawer that was available pretty much whenever they wanted to dig into it. Guess what? While sometimes I’d tell them it was too close to dinnertime or they’d eaten enough, they rarely over-indulged. Mostly, it was their sugar-deprived friends who turned into junk-food-eating-vampires when they came to play.

Today, our daughters are grown and on their own, they shun Mickey D’s and most processed foods, are mindful about what they eat and how it has been grown, appreciate great food, and even know how to bake and enjoy a mean chocolate brownie.

So ladies in the park, believe in yourself and the values you are instilling at home. Learn to say no and suffer the consequences. And, remember there are worse things than an occasional chocolate ice cream cone.

 

 

Rosalyn Hoffman is the author of the newly released Smart Mama, Smart Money: Raising Happy Healthy Kids Without Breaking the Bank (NAL/Penguin March, ’12).

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Publisher’s Weekly Calls “Smart Mama, Smart Money” a “Must-Read!”

The first review is in for Smart Mama, Smart Money: Raising Happy, Healthy Kids Without Breaking the Bank and it’s a rave!  The industry bible, Publisher’s Weekly, gives it
a starred review and calls it “Informative, entertaining, and applicable, this is a must-read for “smart mamas” and papas.” (Read the full review below.) 
.
From the February 6 issue of Publisher’s Weekly 
 Smart Mama, Smart Money: Raising Happy, Healthy Kids Without Breaking the Bank
Rosalyn Hoffman. Penguin/New American Library, $15 trade paper (320p) ISBN 9780451235596
.

“Jack-of-all-trades Hoffman (Bitches on a Budget) compiles the tips and tricks she’s learned in her careers as marketer, mother, and writer to produce an all-in-one guide to frugal parenting. Written to other mothers in tone, but not gender-specific in content, this valuable tome offers suggestions on how to survive the giant-plastic-stuff phase of infancy (buy a used stroller, but a new crib) and paying for college, though the bulk of her advice is focused on the many years between. With two of kids out of college and on their own, she confidently dispenses advice on topics ranging from clothing choices to sex-ed, but manages to do so in a chatty, friendly voice that is never overbearing. Food is a large part of any family’s budget, and Hoffman discusses MyPlate, organics, and “smart shopping” with equal ease. She also provides a brief overview of financial management basics including budgeting, insurance, and credit cards, and her advice about helping kids distinguish “wants” from “needs” is astute and practical. In addition to everyday tips, Hoffman also offers tried-and-true insights into developing strong relationships with one’s children–in the end, “a smart mom never loses sight of what her kids really need: unconditional love, safe boundaries, and room to play.” Informative, entertaining, and applicable, this is a must-read for “smart mamas” and papas. (Mar.)”

 

On sale March 6 at all major bookstores and online.

The Smart Mama Mission Statement (a work in progress)

 

Call it a mission statement, a manifesto, a set of rules, reminders, a way to keep ourselves sane on this crazy journey called motherhood. 

Some tenets we’re trying to live by:

*We will call what we’re doing work. Even if the world doesn’t acknowledge it, we will: motherhood is the hardest work in the world. It’s physically demanding, psychologically strenuous, spiritually complex, and unpaying.  We refuse to accept the whole “I-don’t-work-I-stay-home-with-the-kid” thing. We’ve held lots of jobs, and not one has been more intense.  We know how challenging it is to work outside the home and raise kids, we will never be too proud or silent to ask for help.

*We will complain when we want to. We are allowed to bitch. We’ll never forget the healing power of a good old-fashioned rant.

*We will boast when we want to. Yes, our child is the cutest, smartest, most hilarious, most cuddly on the block.

*We will cry when we need to.

*We will laugh maniacally when we need to.

*We will not forget to play. With our kids and by ourselves.

*We will not forget the power of an occasional martini.

*We will not spend money haphazardly, or on useless status objects, or on stuff we think we “should” have.

*We will not be snobs about thrift stores.

*We will ask for help when we need it.

*While we will boast our kids are the smartest, cutest, most delightful creatures ever planted on this earth   we will not turn them into our status symbols of success.

*We will yell when we need to and feel guilty later.

*We will do our best to educate ourselves, to read valuable books, to attend parenting classes and lectures, to listen to those “experts” we admire—but we will also trust our instincts.

 

*We will avoid the rancorous, black-and-white thinking that pervades the media. We know people raise children in different ways.

*We will forgive ourselves when we make mistakes.

*We will not forget the power of an occasional martini (when they are sleeping and we’re not driving).

*We will share our triumphs, fears, and hopes with other parents. That’s right:parents. We will not forget the important role that fathers play, or deny fathers their own wisdom, their own experience (even if we complain about  or bemoan their incessant need to toss the kid over their heads).

*We will be at our best when we remember to take care of ourselves.

*We will be strong, smart role models. In our successes and in our failures.

*We will keep adding to this list.

*We will keep laughing.

*We will sometimes use salty language—around adults. Of course we can’t stand when people use dirty language around their children. But, on the other hand, isn’t there something  unsettling about mothers who talk baby talk and, even worse, can’t keep it out of adult conversation?

*We will find places of sanity and sanctuary in our own backyard. The library, the nature preserve, the mall.

*We won’t forget who we are.

Tell us: what “rules” do you follow as a mother? Leave a comment! Add to the manifesto!


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